I have added a Google Notice for the keyword “spirituality” to keep an eye on the various topics concerning this word. In the course of checking out the alerts I get once a week there is one title that showed more than any other: Spirituality versus Religion.
There is no versus, comparing spirituality to religion is like comparing apples to oranges. It cannot be done with any sense of realism or normalcy, even a definition escapes the comparison.
Got your thinking caps on or did you just think: This is crap. Maybe it is. But my job is not to tell you what is and what isn’t. I would never dream of interfering with your free will and freedom of choice.
However, I do dare bring a few things to mind so that you may be better informed and consider your current belief in regards to these two concepts. Because concepts they are.
Spirituality is an ideal, a sense of, a feeling, a way of being during meditation, it is beyond the physical realm. A state of being. Spiritual is a state of mind, spirituality is the way of living or being. It is not tangible, there are no rules, or ideals to master. Being a spiritual being is beyond the physical senses, physical plain, unseen with the human eye.
Now religion on the other hand is a collective, a culture, a society. Religion is a set of rules, laws, and common belief system that its members choose to believe and follow. The commonality is set with a governing class. The rules are designed to give the followers, members a guide to live by. Fear is the ruling staff in most religions. Do this not that or be punished, with punishment being a strong sensation of pain and anguish. Corporal punishment is meted out by a God who is jealous, designing, and controlling. Well in most religious writings.
Here is the question: How can you say spirituality versus religion? I do not see it, there is no competition between the two and no comparison.
You can have religion without spirituality and spirituality without religion. Can you have religion with spirituality and spirituality with religion? Yes. Of course you can.
Religion is the set of rules, spirituality is the set of being. Why not join them. When Jesus walked this earth he did so to teach the concept of love, not hate and war. His message was born of the spiritual concepts to move beyond the physical and reside in the realm of spirit.
So where you in your spiritual life? Do you assign spirituality to a set of rules to follow? Or are you like me, live in the state of spirituality more often than not? How do you know spirituality exists?
I would be interested in hearing your opinions, ideas, and join in the discussion.
Peace be with you.
I have answered a request to add three support resources to my Emergency & Recovery Directory. The services include a support group site with counseling services, a mental health resources filled with articles about living with depression and finding the best options for you, and a resource for eating disorders. Each site is filled with plenty of information.
Today I have been busy with all the little things like adding resources and researching information that is relevant to your spiritual progress.
Please subscribe, follow, and stay in touch with me. There is more to come.
Peace be with you.
Blessings as always.
We will continue where we left off in Step 1. If you have practiced the breathing and attention techniques you are familiar with the sensations that occur within your body and the thoughts that run freely.
Perhaps you gave up at the first or second attempt? This is normal. When I first began practicing I swore it could not be done, that those who claimed it worked were lying or were special beyond normal. I left it alone for a few years and then one day was re-introduced to the technique, more than once. It seemed to be the word of the year.
Give yourself permission to be lousy at meditation. Remind yourself it is not something you normally do and like learning any new skill it takes time and practice. Anyone that is an expert in their field will tell you that practice and perseverance were critical to developing their skills.
Desire is the only requirement for any endeavor. If you desire to learn, you will. Desire breeds willingness and perseverance. Let it become your best friend.
Remember to just notice, do nothing. Now for Step 2 to practicing mindfulness.
If you are keeping a journal, make a note of what your felt. The thoughts that arose for you. Write them out, notice how you feel, include this in your journal.
There are plenty of benefits to practicing mindfulness beginning with stress reduction. Hence a multimillion dollar industry continues to flourish.
You are the master of your life, in control and yet not in control. A paradigm and paradox. The choice is yours. You have free will. Remain as you are, put forth no more effort to change or improve your health. No one can force you. Keep spending money on gurus, conferences, books, and keep reading without practice. Osmosis… Sooner or later your life will change. Guaranteed. Change is inevitable. The type of change is your choice.
I am not trying to be harsh or heartless, just factual. These are the facts, change is inevitable, but you get to choose. Let me repeat this: YOU GET TO CHOOSE.
If you would like to discuss your progress or difficulties send me an email or SKYPE me.
Peace be with you.
Mindfulness can be frightening to one who has lived in shadows, hiding from self and the world. Hence the concept of step 1 to mindfulness. Tuning out happens when there is too much external stimuli, trauma from screaming, berating, physical assault, can create a shut down in our body’s system. It becomes a way of life. A false sense of security. Becoming mindful, aware, conscious is a slow and steady process. One step at at time, one breath at a time.
It is a firm conviction that until you find peace you cannot succeed. You may make incremental changes that seem good, but there is no solid ground under you.
The parable Jesus used was planting a mustard seed on a rock, in sand, and in the ground. On a rock the seed has not the ability to root and support itself, so it will fall. In sand the conditions are similar, it may grow, but let water come a long and the support is washed away. But planting the seed in ground, the support is solid, making it easier to care for, thus it will grow strong and well.
Mindfuless will bring you to a place to plant the seed in the ground. Till the soil, preparing it for growth, creating a bountiful crop. Food to feed your body comes from this type of gardening. So chose to take the word of a man who knew and prepare my ground for planting.
Mindfulness begins with being still, noticing, not doing anything but noticing.
That is it. Remember to do nothing but notice. That is your only task, notice. Do not pass judgement, do not label, just notice.
Now get back into your day. No need to pay attention any longer. Do as you always do.
Watch for Step 2 of Mindfulness.
Bless you. Peace be with you.
Self-healing is not about just healing your pains, grievances, traumas, or nightmares. Others have been involved in your life, the course of it, the events in which you were a part of. Grief, pain, the thing of nightmares is brought to those who share your journey. With time and willingness to heal these moments will come back to you. Unless you follow the instructions they will continue to repeat, each time with more intensity. This type of injury will not heal on its own, aid must be given, treatment attended to.
The time comes when recognition for events past and the impact upon others, is heard, felt and seen. There is a time in one’s life when clarity occurs, if one is diligent about self-healing. This moment can have a grand impact, create severe discomfort. The impulse to hide, turn from the memory, the emotions, and recognition of pain caused is strong. Remain with it, do not turn from it, let it move over, through, and around, feel it for what it is, hear what must be heard. This is the path to freedom.
Faith in the Divine grows stronger. Use it. Your Divine powers are there for your highest good and those whose paths you have shared. Send this to the time when the grievance was committed. Ask for the healing of that time, those involved, and leave it to do what must be done. Release all into the hands of the Divine, know it will heal.
These memories will not repeat once healed, rather those that have waited for their turn will appear before you. Repeat this process. One day each event in your life will heal, and freedom from grief is yours. Then the question is how to live in this new life? Without grievance will you know how to live, how to enjoy the time free of ducking and hiding from the past? What a problem to have.
I send you blessings on your journey, may you find the peace you seek, the healing you desire, the new life you deserve. God & Goddess be with you.
In Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous meeting rooms there are small posters situated around the room with a variety of sayings, as there are for many other 12-step fellowships. Each statement is worded in a way to bring about an aha moment, hope that life will improve, or some other idea to the person who reads it.
One such saying brings to mind a multitude of ideas that did not occur in the earlier years. There is something to be said for time in recovery, the aha moments take a on new meanings. The phrase is “I am responsible when someone, somewhere…” How the phrase is worded is lost right now. The part of the phrase most important for this post is “I am responsible…”
“I am responsible for me, the way I think, feel, act, react, my attitude, the way I dress, etc.” Now this does not negate the traumatic experiences one encounters in life. It is not saying that one is responsible for the results from events in one’s life. There is a limit to responsibility. But it does mean that one makes a choice to recover, get sober, and live as he or she always has. There are somethings in one’s life that decisions may be made. I know not everyone wants to hear this, nor is it well received. I did not receive it well at first either, but through the years of application and development I do understand.
Early recovery is difficult. Especially when there is a pile up of emotions, memories, and beliefs that are haunting and traumatic. It is a difficult and emotional time. The older we are before we begin recovery the more experiences we have piled up to find shame, guilt, fear, and trepidation about.
The fact remains that the responsibility for life is in the core of the person living it. Freedom of choice, free will, responsibility, each are held within each and every person. The choice to remain in misery or find the path through it. The choice to laugh or cry, well sometimes that just happens. Then the choice to indulge is left.
When the decision is made to recover there are many wonders and fears to adjust to. Feeling good, laughing, having fun can bring about a panic attack, tears of grief, and other equally surprising emotions. It takes time to adjust to the new life and for sometime it may seem that recovery was not such a great choice after all. Recovery may seem more harmful and hurtful than remaining in the disease. Do not give up.
I was told when I embarked on my journey: “Try recovery out for some time, stay sober, work with others, then if you do not like where you are, go back. You can have a return on your time, take back your misery and multiply it ten fold. That is your guarantee.”
Here is your guarantee: Do not stop before the miracle. If it does not happen in your time line, then take back your misery. It is always there waiting for you to return. It is your right and your choice. No one can take it away from you. Just as no one can offer you any other guarantee that matters.
Want to discuss your plans for recovery? Drop me a line.
To forgive is divine. I do not remember where I heard this, but it seems a bit awkward. God forgives when we ask her, but why should he? If we are born of Divine love, in God’s image, and we have free will, then how is forgiveness required?
The Course in Miracles is a great book to study, read it more than once. Take time to digest it and find the shifts in thinking both for self and with in the book. I have read this book more than a dozen times and each time the words offer new understanding.
The Urtext is the rough draft of the Course In Miracles, you can down load a copy or read it online. The text here is similar, the language is not condensed or choppy as some complain about the final edition of CiM. I enjoy reading this because I get the insights as given by Jesus. Insights like explaining the concepts of iron and spider webs (p15, end of page).
Forgiveness is an act of love which in turn is a miracle. Miracles are always present, born of love, natural and one does not need to think about performing them. This is the nature of the Course (pp15-17).
Forgiveness is equal to atonement. One need only ask for atonement, forgiveness, as Jesus tells us we have everything else. Yet sin is made by man to punish man and since it is created by man and no the Divine why ask for forgiveness? Sin is not a Divine act, will, or design. It is something that man created, born out of religion, a need to control? Where is the proof of any of this? Yet the question remains, why ask for forgiveness? Why ask God, Jesus, or the Divine to atone for “me”?
Forgiveness is the act of love that frees self and the person being forgiven. When asking the Divine to forgive you this is the act of releasing yourself from guilt and shame. But it is also the act of owning your mistake, stating “I know I made a mistake and I need to fix it.” The guilt of creating that mistake may be removed or not.
When there is no shift or change to a healing or loving state of being it may be a sign that you did not mean what you asked for. That you do not believe that what you did require forgiveness.
The other note to make about forgiveness is this, intention and attitude are important. Believe in what you ask for. Learn from this mistake, take note of it, listen to it, remember it. This is necessary to keep from repeating the same mistake.
What is your belief about forgiveness? How do you feel when you consider the concept? Notice any physical sensations, emotions, or thoughts that arise. Listen. Is there anything you might like to change? Or are you comfortable with your belief?
The decision is yours. Not mine. I can write several times over on this topic, each one from a different perspective. My beliefs belong to me. No matter what you read or hear, the final say is yours.
Take what you need and leave the rest.
Remember Star Trek: Next Generation, the Borg (spelling?), Captain Picard fighting to keep his humanity when they captured him? I do. There is a phrase that is repeated and still rings true in life and in the television series, “Resistance is Futile.”
Resistance is that act of refusal. It is defined as: to refuse to accept, a violent opposition, secret organizations with a primary mission of defying the government. When a person resists it is a defiance, a lack of willingness to make a change in his or her life. This can be positive or negative. Resisting temptation, that which is detrimental and harmful to the self is a positive. This is by most definitions a good thing to do.
Resisting positive changes, not making healthy food choices, continuing to live in abusive situations, refusing to see the destruction, openly denying there is a problem knowing this is a lie, these are negative. Each one of these items and so many more are eventually detrimental to the self. Embracing the life of crime, substance abuse, violence, each will take a toll on the body, mind, and soul. This is a life filled with negative and destructive energies.
Resistance is not something that is easily overcome. Defenses kick in, the mind and body’s effort to protect the organism. Every human being shows some form of resistance. Change is not an easy concept to embrace even when it is for the good. Relationships bring defenses into action, all relationships. Job changes, dietary need changes, health issues. Each one has its own unique way of triggering resistance.
The excuses are multiple, never ending, and really empty when you get to it. The words are spoken in a tone of voice that means a threat of some sort. The voice tone is the intimidating part of all resistance, not the words. I can always recall the tone not the exact words when this happens.
Resistance is that which keeps us from harm, also recovery. Fear feeds the resistance. Fear keeps the defenses alive and powerful. It is fear that speaks when a suggestion or change is made. Fear has a powerful voice, and resistance is only one of its many tools.
Identify the physical sensation, the words that trot around in your mind, take a breath and listen. Practice this each time someone makes a suggestion that you react to, listen to the resistance as it speaks to you. Ask it, what is it you want? Listen, take a time out and breath with the sensations. Your body will tell you all you need to know. What is the answer? What was the suggestion?
Need an ear? I have two. Contact me and lets discuss how I can help you learn to listen.
Bless you on your journey of recovery. Thank you for inspiring me.
The information I uncovered in a Google search relates the term to hoarding. Hoarding is a phenomenon where a person holds on to things he or she believes is valuable in some way, it cannot get thrown out. Before long there is no room for the person to walk or live in his or her home. The objects of importance have taken up residence. The term clutter blindness is related to this phenomenon as the inability to see the clutter. Blind to the way clutter has taken over the home and moved the person out. Clutter is a stack of items that may be disorderly or neatly stacked. The items may hold some emotional value to the person collecting them.
Clutter blindness is not just about hoarding. It is a phenomenon of its own. The person may see that there is a pile of newspapers, dishes, or other items collecting in an area but ignores them. The minimization of the clutter is part of the blindness. The blindness is progressive until the issue is brought to light, then the overwhelm of the clutter takes over and the person is frozen and unable to do anything about it. This is also an aspect of hoarding. Perhaps hoarding is the latter stages of clutter blindness.
There are several articles relating to clutter blindness, one includes ways to de-clutter your home. The first suggestion is to invite people over for a party (See resources for more information.) This is suggested as a way of motivating you to clean your home. This is great if the only problem is a few stacks of things sitting around that you would not want someone to see. What happens if you are on the overwhelm part and cannot possible clean up? The idea of bringing people into your home is insane, rather the shame and guilt arises with the fear of judgment. A few individuals I know refuse to bring anyone into their home, this includes asking anyone to help them clear the clutter. The last thing you would want is for someone to see your home a mess. We all know what is thought of “those people.” There are television reality shows created using “those people.”
Begin with baby steps. Ask yourself what is so important about the stack of papers or newspapers? Are there articles that mark the passage of time in your life? Then clip them with the newspaper title, paste them in a scrap book. Then recycle the newspapers and magazines. This is a good time to develop the three or six month rule. If you have not read it or looked at it in that amount of time it is not important any more. Do not look at it and recycle it.
The rule for clothing and other similar items is usually six months or a year. If it has hung in your closet through a second season and you have not worn it, recycle, donate, but get rid of it. Reading material, dishes, pots and pans, any nicknacks, receipts, collectables without a great deal of value, hold a yard sale and what you do not sell donate to the nearest charity, then put the receipts in a file for your taxes at the end of the year. Recycle any receipts that do not pertain to your taxes.
Baby steps! Congratulations on the first one. Even crawling is better than not moving forward at all. If you are really stuck and want to make a few bucks and gain your 15 minutes of fame write the show “Hoarders.” They may feature you and help you clean your house. But check to be sure that those things that are of value are resold and those not valuable are recycled.
Congratulations on your first step towards recovery. Clutter blindness is a part of what ever is happening in your life, depression, loss, trauma, there are many beginnings in this journey. The end is up to you. Need someone to talk it through, contact me, I am a great listener and on occasion do come up with some great ideas. Bless you, may the next step take you to your destination.
AARP Bulletin: When possessions rule your life
NPR Books: Hoarding: When Too Much ‘Stuff’ Causes Grief
Unclutter.com: Strategies for seeing clutter
Do you have an answer to this question? What comes to mind when you read this question?
Well, let me tell you this about me, have not clue. I was asked once if I could describe me. Who I am… My description was met with derision.
The comment following was simple yet profound. “You described what you do, not who you are.” What I do? All those titles and not one said who I am. Not then and not now.
How do you answer the question? Do you list the labels attached to you? Labels like mom, sister, father, brother, clerk, nurse, doctor, chief, bottle washer, housekeeper? Or what about woman, man, girl, boy? Who are you?
On a earlier post I made some comments about the phrase “I am.” About 2o years ago there was a commercial for Verizon, I think that was it. The people stood in a crowd and held up signs that said “I AM.” I thought, “Wow. What a profound comment.” Then I came across an article that said everything after the phrase “I am” denotes ownership of that word or description.
Sitting in 12-step meetings I listened to people introduce themselves using “I am.” Phrases like “I am an alcoholic or addict.” I began realizing that this meant this is who I am. I was not sure who I was but I did not want to own a disease, a dysfunction, especially when I watched what it represented in the world.
Define alcoholic, addict, gambler, or any other phrase that fits with a 12-stepper. It is a negative definition. One that nearly everyone I knew who used it, used it as an excuse for living their lives without hope. Lies, stealing, gossiping, it all remains in a person’s life until he or she decides to stop it. There should be a 12-step for this type of behavior.
An old saying that can be shifted to nearly anything: You can take the drunk out of the bar. But you cannot take the bar out of the drunk.
That which is defined as a drunk are the beliefs, the actions, the ideas of who and what one believes is true.
Who are you?
My answer today? I am…. My gender is female, woman, sexuality is heterosexual, age is 56 considered to be a crone or wise woman, my occupation is spiritual counselor, minister/priestess, student, coach…. I have many titles to describe me as a person. But who I am is the daughter of the Divine, a goddess and nothing less. I am filled with love. Tempered by my old beliefs and behaviors, the way I have always reacted to drama and crisis. These things are not me, but what I do. They are life lessons taught through experience beginning with my parents (step-father).
I AM: Divine, love, grace,
I AM: anger, trauma, nightmare.
These things are a part of me, the inner part that is seeking healing. When I let them speak the result is silence. But I have to let them speak.
Who am I? A woman of Divine guidance willing to change, to grow beyond human experience and embrace the Divine.
Bless you and know I am available to share your journey. Click the Services tab at the top of the page.
(The song titles: Who are you? were performed by the Who in 1978 (written by Peter Townsend) and Black Sabbath in 1973 (written by Black Sabbath). I like both versions. There is another one performed by Shades in 1977… )